Surviving
During these past few weeks, I’ve found cancer creeping up in my life in many ways. There are three events in particular that have me reflecting deeply on this disease. First, (so as not to cause any concern!) I want to share the news that I had my latest check-up at Dana Farber this past Monday and I’m still ALL CLEAR! Certainly a big relief – it marks seven months that I have been totally rid of cancer and I can tell you that it feels damn good. Second exciting news is that last Thursday I participated in a fundraiser that raised over $8,000 for Dana Farber cancer research. The night was such an inspiration. Julie Gibson, a friend who I work with at BOWES GMAC Real Estate, decided (while I was going through treatment) that she would run the Boston marathon in my name this year. Suffice it to say, she’s amazing. And so, together, we are raising money for Dana Farber cancer research. Julie put together this great event that brought together our friends and family. I was just blown away by the turnout and the support. And I’m so happy that together we were able to raise so much money for this great cause. Please visit www.danafarberjulie.com for more information and to make a donation. The third event is not so exciting. Three weeks ago we lost a great man to this disease. Paul Maguire. He was a friend at St. Eulalia Parish and a man who has been fighting lung cancer for some time now. I was being treated during the same time that he was and a deep bond was created between us. It’s hard for me to describe entirely in words; we shared “battle stories” with various drugs, talked about losing hair and energy, and all of the other fun stuff that goes along with treatment. But the bond goes well beyond what we talked about. It is this feeling of profound empathy that we shared. As I recovered, his cancer worsened. He was going through a last round of chemotherapy. I suppose I should not have been so shocked by his death, but I was. I still am. You see, when you survive you are full of hope. Full of this feeling that this thing can be beat. And I never really thought Paul wouldn’t beat it. Of course that was unrealistic of me. Every cancer is different and every case is different. Still, my heart aches at this loss. I’ve realized during these past few weeks, that since treatment ended I have buried my experiences with this disease. It’s like a...
Ghandi
Tonight I finally watched Ghandi – a truly incredible film directed by Richard Attenborough and starring Ben Kingsley. Perhaps we all know a bit about who Ghandi was and what he did, but this movie really shed light on so much for me. A role model, he was and is for us all as human beings. Amidst a world so obsessed with tackling problems with violence, Ghandi shows us the power in nonviolence. He was able to lead a movement towards India’s independence from an oppressive British empire, with the tool of peaceful non-cooperation. And when this mission went astray, when violence did break-out, he responded by fasting. He would simply stop eating until the violence stopped. Most crucially, Ghandi teaches us that the violence must be overcome within ourselves – in our hearts. “The Only Devils in this world are those running around inside our own hearts, and that is where all our battles should be fought.” I can only say that I must continue to reflect on those words, every day. What do those devils look like? Where do they come from? How can they be conquered? I think the answer is love. I really do. But it isn’t easy, is it? Ghandi reminds me that love does not sit idle. Love must not only come in the shape of praying hands. Love must move us to act. Love demands that we take action. Love is not pacifism. Love is standing for what’s right. Ghandi, and his followers, shined a light on what real love is and on the greatness it can achieve. Just as Ghandi took a stand, so too can we. We do not have to accept the prevailing notions that war can solve the world’s problems; that violence can be justified as a means to an end – despite what our leaders (including President Obama) tell us. We have to demand better. First from ourselves, then from the world. And that includes our role in killing millions of people every year who die from poverty. Ghandi said it, “poverty is the worst form of violence.” He challenges us to rethink everything we “know.” But he led not from a position of authority, instead from humility. He was a human being, like every one of us. Every one of us is capable of the same humanity. It begins with a radical shift in our hearts and in our minds. I’m so thankful for this role model. I know I still have much to learn from the imprint he has left on this...
People Don’t Kill People, Technology Kills People!
I just finished watching a fascinating FRONTLINE episode titled, Digital Nation, described on the show’s website as “an in-depth exploration of what it means to be human in a 21st century digital world.” My mind is still going in a million directions, totally captivated by this report on modern technology. I feel as though this very blog is an archaic form of communication – perhaps I should have webcammed my thoughts (is that a verb yet?) or even better, I probably should have created an avatar who could read this to you in a virtual reality. Okay, but seriously…where the hell are we going? I mean, what’s going on? Am I going to have a sit-down with my grandchildren one day and explain what reading books was like? Sighh… Truly, technology is a struggle for me. It’s a love/hate thing, I think. I love it, I embrace it, I spend the night with it. Then I push it away. I wake up in the morning and ask it to leave. Terrible and probably offensive metaphor. Sorry for that. What I’m doing right now is writing what I’m thinking. You should try it someday, if you haven’t before. And I’m procrastinating as well, because I just don’t know which side to weigh in on here. I really do value technology; it has so much to offer the world. Let me put it a different way: I would be dead if it were not for technology. I would be dead right now. Just rewind to my first few entries and you’ll know what I mean. Chemotherapy – a word that still tastes bad as I say (write) it – saved my life. Technological advances in medicine saved my life and I am eternally grateful for that. Score: Technology 1, Scientology 0 Technology also kills. It takes lives every day and it dehumanizes the very act of killing another person. The Predator is my point in case. Ever heard of it? I had, but this FRONTLINE episode made it real for me. Of course I need to use that term, real, very delicately. The Predator, aside from a great Arnold flick, is a type of UAV – Unmanned Aerial Vehicle. Remember that remote control airplane you always wanted when you were a kid? Just like that. Except this time imagine that you have an extra button that can launch missiles at people you don’t like. Score: Technology 1, Humanity -1 The Predator is technology’s answer to killing people, without those nasty side effects; nausea, guilt, self-doubt, sense of remorse, etc. The Predator is technology at its worst. Strike that. The Predator is...
“Please do not be Cynical”
There was some pretty powerful television this past Friday night that has really stuck with me. It’s the first time in many years that I’ve actually stayed in to watch television on a Friday night – but I must say that it was well worth it. You may be guessing that the Hope for Haiti Telethon is what I’m referring to. I don’t want to downplay that event in the slightest, because all in all I thought it was well-done and I’m thrilled with the fact that $58 million was raised to help the people of Haiti. However, the really poignant moment (for me) came in Conan O’Brien’s last episode as host of the Tonight Show. I have been a fan of Conan for many, many years; enjoying his unique style of humor and his unlimited capacity to make fun of himself. I must admit though, that I am no die-hard fan and have not kept up to date with his shows lately. I knew a little about the debacle with NBC wanting to move Leno back to his old time slot, bumping Conan (who is only in his first year as host of the Tonight Show) and so I made it a point to watch his final show. It was a bitter sweet moment, for sure. I know Conan will go on to entertain us in great ways, but still, this would be his final night in a role that he was born to play. He had much to say – both lighthearted and thoughtful. It all climaxed towards the end of the show, in a manner that I’ve never seen him speak before and almost breaking out in tears; this is a piece of what he had to share: “All I ask is one thing, and I’m asking this particularly of young people that watch. Please do not be cynical. I hate cynicism – for the record it is my least favorite quality. It doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they would get. But if you work really hard and your kind, amazing things will happen. I’m telling you – amazing things will happen.” Wow. Perhaps I am playing up the moment (or not supplying enough context), but it really touched me. I felt a deep connection to his words, and I’ve been thinking about them ever since. Okay, so his words aren’t Ghandian (if that isn’t a word, it should be) or Shakespearean. Yet they touch upon a fact of life that we easily lose sight of. So often, I feel the collection of cynicism that seemingly snowballs with age. I...
What it Means to be Pro-Life
Yesterday I sat in church deeply disconcerted. A large banner hung in the church that said “God is pro-life. Are you?” and the mass was injected with messages against abortion. This week marks the 37th anniversary of Roe v Wade this week – a supreme court decision that legalized abortion and the reason many will be marching in protest in Washington this week. This disconcerting feeling is nothing new to me when talking about abortion. It is an issue that I have given much thought to, but have remained undecided about. As a human rights activist, it causes me grief to not be able to take a stance on such a heated issue. First off, I have always hated the false dichotomy of each side: “pro-choice” v “pro-life”. Pro-choice does not equal pro-death. So you may have guessed, that I have historically leaned towards a woman’s right to choose. I have never been pro-abortion; it simply feels wrong to me that the government would have control over a woman’s body. And so I sit, uncomfortably, in church while it is preached that God is “pro-life”. And then I have what may be my first clear thought on the issue. I ask: What does it really mean to be pro-life? What does God think about the children we drop bombs on? What does God think about the 30,000 children that we kill every day because we don’t share our water with them, and we don’t share our food with them, and we don’t share our medicine with them? I grow more impatient and more upset. I feel sick. Why don’t we have this sort of movement to save their lives? Why aren’t we marching to stop the bombs and start the medicine? How can we keep ignoring these children? Then and there, in my pew, I decide that as long as we allow a baby to die from dehydration I cannot stand against abortion. As long as we decide not to give a child a 50 cent treatment that will save her life, I cannot stand against abortion. Haiti presents a perfect example of the suffering that need not be. I pray that we do not ignore the reasons behind the devastation happening there. It is a place where so many people already lived on the brink – in abject poverty. And this act of mother nature has pushed many over the edge. If we had cared more for the people of Haiti before January 12th, the level of destruction and the loss of life would have been far less. We did not cause this earthquake, but we are responsible...
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