Becoming a Daddy (Blogger)
This blog is all about shifting perspective. It originated with that life-changing diagnosis, which has continued to be an important lens in my life. Just last month I had my latest checkup at Dana Farber; six years, cancer free. It’s hard to believe that much time has passed. That lens will always be important. And now I’ve got a new one to add to my kit. One that I am certain will let a whole new light in, to see the world in a different way: fatherhood. *gasp!* Okay, lots of drama. It was in the title for crying out loud. But honestly, just writing that word—fatherhood—gives me goosebumps. In just six weeks I’m going to be a dad, and that is f’n crazy. Don’t get me wrong, this was all part of the plan. My wife and I knew we wanted to have kids. Parents that I talked to would tell me, you’ll know when you’re ready. And I definitely feel ready. Recently I was caught chatting with a friend who is a dad about how to make our own baby food. A coworker, and mother of two, overheard and stopped us in the middle, stunned and impressed to hear two dads having this sort of conversation. Baby food aside, there’s some pretty raw matter being formed right now in my head and heart. Already we had our first scare; a complication pretty early on in the pregnancy. Going in for an emergency ultrasound was actually the scariest moment in my life, I think. Waiting, hand-in-hand with my wife, to see on the screen that little heart beating. My own cancer diagnosis was a walk in the park compared to this. Fortunately, everything turned out just fine. Now the delightful anticipation continues. What a gift it is, to be able to bring a child into the world. I can’t wait to meet you. Will you be a girl or a boy? That’s the first question, right? But much more important, who will you really be? What sort of person? What a responsibility. There’s the physical taking care of you part, which I’m sure will be plenty of work, but then there is the shaping of a human being. That feels like a whole other level of responsibility. I’ll do my best to help you grow into the person you are supposed to be, not the person I think you should be. I have hopes, sure. I hope you will be a caring person. I hope you will learn to be empathetic, from your mother especially. I worry about the world you will be born into. It is a...
Making Time Matter—Inspired by Boyhood
If a good piece of art allows you to pause for a moment and think in a different way, then a piece that stays with you long after, as a focal point for thinking differently about life, is a masterpiece. There’s no lack of art forms in this world from which to derive meaning. Movies are the form that have generally spoken most profoundly to me—even though lately I’ve found some television to be superior. Every now and again, a movie comes along and confirms, or even restores, my faith in the medium. This past year, that movie was Boyhood. Filmed over twelve years, this narrative fiction tells the story of a boy, his sister, and his parents as they all grow up together. This long-term filming has never been done before for a fictional piece and the result is breathtaking. At the forefront, it captures and serves as a commentary on the passing of time. It struck like a lightning bolt of nostalgia when I first saw the film in in July. “Dear God, so many moments have passed so quickly already in my life,” I thought. And as I’ve reflected on that over the last several months, I’ve decided to focus more purposefully on time in this new year. I’m going to build a time machine. Just kidding. Though, maybe watching a movie is as close as we can come to entering a time machine right now. I apparently have a habit of using movies as focal points for my new year. This blog has been a place for me to think through where and how I derive meaning in life, and often that is inspired by art. As I think about how to “plan out” my 2015, I realized the standard list of things I’d like to accomplish just wasn’t cutting it. For example, I’d love to pursue more creative projects this year. But what will they be? Should I resolve to write blogs more frequently and consistently through the year? Should I resolve to produce a short film? Another music video? Should I take more photos? I’d love to do all of these things, frankly. I think, though, that what I love most is the process of creating. The meaning, for me, comes more from the process than the output. And while I find it difficult to control the output of any of these things—just how many and which type of blogs or videos I’ll produce—I can control the space I give to the creative half (quarter? tenth?) of my brain. I can allocate time simply for the process without an end in sight. And that’s...
Searching for home. Finding perspective.
Until I started house-hunting, I didn’t realize how stressful the process could be. Take the house that I recently came close to purchasing. For days, my wife and I imagined ourselves in this new, larger home; we planned how our furniture would fit in the various spaces, how great it’d be to cook in a new kitchen, how our future children would play outside. Alas, after excruciating consideration, we decided this house wasn’t quite the right place for us. It was an emotional roller-coaster, and by the end of it I began to feel hopeless. Would we ever find the right home? But the next morning, as I continued to mull things over, a thought struck sharp and deep: Right now, as I obsess over upgrading my living situation, there are millions of refugees who have fled Syria and are without any homes at all. Read the rest of this post on Oxfam’s First Person...
Living The Right Story: A Lesson From Samwise Gamgee
How’s your year going so far? Nearly three months in and I think I’m only just getting into my stride—hence this being the first blog of 2014. January, while super-productive and exciting, was also pretty hectic. I worked on two major projects: the brand new Oxfam America website, which launched at the end of the month, and a new music video for Paul Brown & The Killing Devils that I filmed in Los Angeles at the beginning of the month. The latter was a ton of fun and I’m now enjoying editing it together (I’ll be sure to keep you posted on when it comes out!). The former, now that it has launched and I can stop to think about it, is one of the most important projects I’ve ever worked on. It’s just a website, right? I could spend this whole post writing about what that means; how it is the face of our organization and a primary method of communication with our community across the US—people who give their time, money, and energy to help make the world a better place. But I’m not going to write a blog about that. Instead, I’m going to write a blog about The Lord of the Rings. Well, not a blog exactly about The Lord of the Rings, as much as it is about a particular scene from one of The Lord of the Rings movies. Yes, I think about scenes from fantasy movies in my spare time. The funny thing about this one is that it randomly came up twice in the matter of a couple of weeks and from completely different places—a sign that’s probably worth paying attention to. I was explaining to my friend John how I enjoyed the latest two The Hobbit movies, but that they just didn’t seem to have the same depth as The Lord of the Rings movies. I don’t care much about any of the characters aside from the protagonist, Bilbo Baggins, and I don’t feel much emotional connection to the story either. But with The Lord of the Rings trilogy, it was different. Sure, there are several action-packed fantasy moments and dozens of quotes I still geek out over with friends, but there were also rich characters and beautiful moments that stuck with you. Hey, they stuck with me anyway. I’ll cut to the chase and point out the scene I talked to John about and, to my delighted surprise, the same scene that Dr. Paul Farmer references in a speech he gave at the University of Miami in 2004, which is featured in his book I’m now reading, To Repair the World: Paul Farmer Speaks to the Next Generation. It happens...
Breaking Bad: How TV Got So Damn Good
Five years ago, in response to his cancer diagnosis, Walter White connected with his former student Jesse Pinkman and started a business producing crystal meth. There were ups and there were downs in the five years that followed. Mostly there were downs. Breaking Bad took viewers to dark, anxiety-filled depths, but even while it wouldn’t be called an enjoyable experience, it was a profoundly addictive one. After finally catching up with the finale of Breaking Bad, I got to thinking about how many crazy good TV shows there are these days – Mad Men, Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, to name a few. They all have incredible production value, especially compared to older TV productions. Of course there have been countless good TV shows in the past, but it feels as though TV has only recently matched the quality of movies. The relationship between TV and movies has long been akin to siblings competing for attention. First there was the big screen, in all it’s glory: A train rushed forward, seemingly through the screen, sending an audience running in panic and claiming a dominant space for movies forever more. Then, television sets entered living-rooms in the nineteen forties and fifties. You could watch moving pictures in your own home! I can only imagine how incredible that must have been (sorry, born in 1985). Would this be the end of movie theaters? Hardly. Color came to movies first, making them all the more lifelike. Of course it was only a matter of time before TV sets would master the technology as well. Theaters had increasingly great sound and image quality – and eventually the 16:9 wide screens. But it’s younger brother was gaining fast. Alas, the home theater, with Dolby surround sound and high-definition 1080p, flat-panel widescreen televisions put a stake right through the big screen’s heart. 3D may be the movie industry’s last gasp for air. TV sucked it right up. Word is still out on whether 3D, which has far improved since its last attempts in the 1950s and 1980s-90s, will make much difference. Okay, so the race for the best technology continues. But the fact is, TV technology is far enough along that it can beautifully present high-quality productions like Breaking Bad. It’s no longer a second-tier outlet for directors, writers, actors and the rest of the entertainment industry. And so much of the storytelling and production quality has drastically improved. At least that’s my take on it, which, by the way, I’m sure is in no way a novel one and misses many important details! And of course I’m leaving out another sibling. The Internet is younger...
Recent Comments